Lately I’ve had this intense fascination with being hit by a car…I keep ending up going outside when it gets dark and standing by the highway, or on the sharp corners of country roads around here in the rain.Just fantasizing about taking the one step forward. Like, I don’t even care if I would die from it or being horribly maimed… FuckI really need to get out of here.Or more sleep.I never sleep anymore…. Leaving in a week to get help…Not sure if I want to though.